Church of Cash

Wednesday, January 24, 2024

Keith grew up listening to Johnny Cash, so we went to a Johnny Cash tribute band tonight. They were very good. Keith knew all the songs and I knew five. I still enjoyed it very much. They played a lot of audience requests, and it was so cool the way the lead singer would listen to all the shouted-out titles, say one back, and the band would kick it off immediately. There was no discussion or counting off or anything, just bam! let’s go.

***************************************************************************

The house lights went down and the band came out and started the show with Walk the Line. I checked my phone. I had just texted someone that I was at Lyric Arts at a show. She had written “have fun” and I had written back “I will”. There wasn’t another text. I turned my phone off, then quickly clicked it back on, just to make sure. Nope, no more texts. I went to the settings page -all those little icons. I rubbed my right index finger on the screen and made them all bounce a little bit. I turned off my phone. I turned on my phone. I looked at the lock screen. I rubbed my finger on my picture of the boys on my wallpaper. I looked at the settings page. Cute icons. I checked my text – still nothing new from her. I rebooted my phone. It went dark for a moment, then lit up blue with a big orange circle off center. It was bright, but it didn’t bother me. I held it up in the air, beaming the blue light down on my face and on those behind me. That was fun. I gave a whooop! I threw my hands up in the air. I put my phone in my purse. I clapped, but realized I couldn’t figure out when to clap so I stopped. I got my phone out to check if it had rebooted. It had. I rubbed the boys’ faces and checked my settings page. I tried swiping to the right, but there wasn’t another page. I swiped to the left, but still nothing. Oh! Up and down. I moved the little icons up and down about an inch, then just rubbed my finger in a circle. The icons sort of vibrated, trying to figure out if I wanted to click on one, or to move them. I didn’t need any of them. I checked the wallpaper. The boys were still there. Still no more texts from my friend. I wondered if she had gotten my text that I was at a show. I guess she had because she had responded. But then I responded and she didn’t respond again. I checked again. Huh. Nothing. I thought I should reboot again. Oh! There’s the blue light and orange circle. Such a beam of light blue light. I waved it back and forth in front of me before dropping it in my purse. Whooooo!! I better check to see if it rebooted. Oh, it’s not done yet. I will wave the light so the people behind me can see it. There it is, done rebooting. I will check my news feed. Oh, Jill Biden invited someone to the White House. I will read about that. No internet? Really? In the theater? I doubt that is right. I will reboot my phone. Oh! Blue light! Beautiful shining down on me. I hear someone behind me laughing and that makes no sense because the band is singing a train song, I think, and train songs aren’t funny. Still shining that blue light. I do love it. There are my sweet boys. I will rub their faces again for luck. I will check the settings, make those icons wiggle, then check about Jill Biden. Seriously! Still no internet. Well, forget it. I put my phone in my purse. Whooooooo! Hoooo. Whoop Whooop. I am waving my arms over my head, but my hands are heavy and my wrists just aren’t supporting them. My hands all just tipped over. I don’t think I like that. Let me check my phone. Settings – check. Text – nothing. Settings – rub them up and down. Wallpaper – still there. Settings – still there. Jill Biden – it says she invited someone. Everything looks fine. I put my phone in my purse. I banged my shoulder on my friend sitting next to me. We waved our arms over our heads together before realizing the band man was talking and there was no music. Why is he talking so much. We need more music. I wonder if my phone needs to be rebooted. Probably. I better do that. Okay! There’s the blue light. I feel better. Where is that laughing coming from? What does that woman behind me think is funny. This is a concert, not a comedy show. Seriously. I will shine my blue light at her and she will feel happy like I do. I am really enjoying this show. It’s going so fast. I hardly know what songs they have done, it’s going so fast.

*************************************************************************

Oh! Wait! That wasn’t me! That was the lady in front of me.

Seriously.

It went on until they said they were going to do Johnny’s biggest hits to finish out the show. Then she and her friend and their husbands got up and left.

Buh-bye!!!